GeekyArtistArabWoman - Lubzi

The juice of my heart

I call myself Lubzi. I am from Palestine. I live there too
I am a blend of cultures, a salad of sounds, colors & words. I like to create. I love learning. I aspire to inspire. I seek freedom, harmony, peace and justice. I like to be a bridge between hearts and minds, between people from different cultures and backgrounds.
Here you'll find my theatre sound designs, audio art pieces, some of my writings and sketches & all kinds of crazy mixes and audio experiments that I do.

Saturday, September 26, 2009

For you to be you and for me to be me

Allow me to feel my pain
Allow me to connect with it
don't dismiss me
give me room to breathe
I need to let it all out
it is poisoning my system
the years of oppression and neglect are getting to me
I need a safe place
give me your unconditional love so that I can give you mine
feel my pain so that I can feel yours
my pain is a big part of who i am
I dont want to feel embarrassed of my pain
I am allowed to feel it !

You say : move on, move on...
how can I?
I will I know - one day maybe, when I am safe
when i am heard

Marginalized - do you know how painful that is ?
feer hurts!
Exposed...
I want to be exposed to you
with all my pain and brilliance
my genuis and depression

I dont want to be embarrassed because of my oppression
"it is not an issue" , you say. My life is way better that many others -
But you know, it is MINE, my pain is mine- I am the one who feels it.
My pain needs love
be gentle with my pain
my darkness needs the light of understanding
solidarity

Dont dismiss me
can you accept me the way i am? with my beauty and baggage?
do you see my beauty at all?
I tell the ocean about my pain - the trees hear me

God hears me
I crave the unity of the soul , a community of the heart
communion with God through you and him and her
help me drop my defenses
help me get rid of my identities - I want to be whole when with you
how can i if i am not whole within myself?

help me break free from the grinding wheel - acknowledge my courage - my struggle
embrace my schizophrenia
my madness is part of me
my madness IS me

take me as a whole
Allow me to be me so that I can cease to be me
What I feel is real even if it doesnt make sense to you
Do you know how it feels to be jailed? stripped of your freedom?
do you know how it feels to be a woman? an arab? a palestinian? an artist?
do you want to know? do you care to know?
Does anyone care to know?

Why would they, depressing lamentation ...
minority colonialism feminism ...
identity stuff boring depressing activist blabla..
why would you care ? you were born up there
on the top of the hill

but if you want to be you
i need to be me
there is no you without a me
and only when you stop being you
is when I become me
and only then
is when I stop being me
only then
you can be you
and i can be me
do you see ?
what I'm trying to say ?
Yes or Nay?
Hey?
Hello
Knock knock..
anyone there
or just an empty headskin

let's both seize to be
you and me
and only be
a one:
'We'

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